Then vs. Now

Once Champagne, now string cheese.

I’ve said this before, and if you are one of my regular readers, I’ve probably said this to you: I will not write about suicide. I will not write about suicide because it terrifies me more than any other kind of death—and all the kinds of death terrify me. Like any loving mother, what I dread beyond anything is the chance that I will outlive one of my children, and outliving one of my children would be even more dreadful if that child died by suicide.

The nominal reason I will not, for example, cause a character in a novel I write to die by suicide is because a young woman I loved very much, a friend, once sat across from me in my bedroom and, bemoaning her rejection from a professional program, said, “Phlebotomy Shlebotomy…,” which made both of us laugh. A month later, she took her own life, after having sent this text: “See you soon, Mom…,” which shreds my heart and would shred the heart of anyone who had a heart. So whenever I do mention suicide, I write about how-dare-you-commit-suicide, because how dare you take yourself from those who cannot live without you?

And this I have done more than once—but not in the way I am right now.

So, this is not a little spiel about suicide but about not writing about suicide—and about the late and wonderful and apparently depressed‑yet‑somehow‑joyous designer Kate Spade.

I’m obsessed with Kate Spade.

I’m not the only one.

A writer I knew sort‑of‑well for a while and liked very much once planned to write a novel or a series of prose poems about Kate Spade and Alexander McQueen, another great designer of accessories and apparel—and another apparently wonderful person who also died by suicide.

This month’s hot reading tip, then, was written by Elyce Arons, Kate Spade’s best friend, who grew up dreaming with her of creativity and celebrity, and who mourns her still, more than a decade after Kate’s death.

Since I’m about to embark on the publicity efforts surrounding the publication of my upcoming‑in‑December novel, The Birdwatcher (see my website and this space for events), I want to share a little notion for you of what these “book tours” used to look like—and what they look like today (at least, for most of us authors).

HOT RECIPE TIP

Grits Gruyère

Rich, cheesy, and just this side of scandalous—this is grits dressed for the holidays.

Photo credit to Aggie Ochs.

Here is my recipe tip, by the way. It is very, very simple and is as gooey and rich as it seems from the ingredients, but bring it to any holiday gathering and you will be praised as the chef you are probably not.

INGREDIENTS

• 4  cups milk (I use whole milk)

• 1 stick butter

• ½  tsp salt

• ½  tsp minced garlic

• 1  cup quick‑cooking or instant grits (about five packages if you use the Quaker Oats kind)

• 6–8 oz shredded Gruyère cheese

• Tabasco sauce or cayenne pepper to taste

• ½ cup grated Parmesan cheese

Bring the milk, butter, and salt almost to a boil in a heavy saucepan. Stir in the grits. Cook until thickened, stirring constantly. Remove from heat and stir in the Gruyère cheese and hot sauce. Spoon into a buttered 2‑quart baking dish and sprinkle with Parmesan cheese. Bake at 340 degrees for 15–30 minutes, until set. Broil for five minutes to brown the top.

HOT LIFE TIP

Read more. Turn off your TV. Turn off your laptop. Turn off the notifications on your phone and hide it. (You can do this; the person who really needs to reach you will call back. The person who only sort‑of reached out is not worth your attention.)

Read before sleeping. There’s a reason your parents used to (I hope) read you bedtime stories. Reading—or even hearing—stories takes you out of your quotidian life, rearranges your thinking, sparks speculation and therefore creativity, and sends you on a path to dreaming. It also has no calories. What could be better?

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A brilliant grad student turned high‑priced escort, Felicity Wild is charged with killing her two most devoted clients for their insurance money. Her childhood best friend, Reenie Bigelow, a fashion journalist covering the trial, is certain that Felicity is not capable of murder. So why won’t she say a single word in her own defense? Why would an innocent woman willingly go to prison? Reenie has to find out—but she knows Felicity, and she knows one thing for sure: under no circumstances would Felicity ever tell a lie.

But now—a reader contest (actually, two!) in anticipation of this publication.

1. If you were the character Reenie, and you were a fashion journalist who had never covered a murder trial but now were tasked with writing about not just any murder trial but the murder trial of your best friend—where would you start? Which people would you ask about Felicity and what happened to turn her bright future into a dark destiny?

Give me a good answer, even if it’s not the exact answer in the book—let’s see how good you are at plotting a novel.

You’ll win a copy of a favorite book from my own library, a copy of my 2023 novel A Very Inconvenient Scandal (the story of what happens when a celebrated young underwater photographer learns that her 60‑year‑old widowed father is marrying her best friend—who is also, oh no, pregnant), a sleep mask for when you’re finished reading, and a lovely little handmade journal.

2. If you were going to write an opening line for this novel, what would it be?

Send your entries to me at jgmitchard@gmail.com or to my lovely and talented helper, Sara Boland, at sara@personality‑hire.com.

There’ll also be a Cast‑the‑Movie contest—so watch this space! (You can even hope there’ll be a movie!) I would cast Dakota Johnson as Reenie Bigelow. Thus, here, by the way, is Dakota Johnson hooked up to a polygraph machine:

Reenie considers herself a gifted liar, by contrast with her friend Felicity—so you understand my inclusion of this very funny little segment.

“Jacquelyn Mitchard’s The Birdwatcher is at once a gripping mystery and a nuanced portrait of a complicated friendship. With her trademark insight and compassion, Mitchard explores the ways our pasts can both bind and betray us. Her clear‑eyed prose captures the stubborn hope that propels us to keep searching for the truth. I couldn’t put it down.”
— Adrienne Brodeur, bestselling author of Wild Game and Little Monsters

I'd be honored if you’d consider pre-ordering. I can’t wait to share this story with you.

Also - the paperback of A Very Inconvenient Scandal is available now.